Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With many cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus
I know the scientific names of (1)____________ animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (2)____________ Major-General
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I know our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox
I (3)__________ in (4)________________ all the crimes of Heliogabalus
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous
I can tell undoubted
Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I know the (5)________________ chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of which I've heard the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And (6)______________ all the airs
From that infernal (7)________________ Pinafore
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Then I can write a (8)______________ bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And (9)________ you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (10)____________ Major-General
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can (11)________ at sight a Mauser rifle (12)________ a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more (13)________ at
And when I (14)________ precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, (15)________ I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a (16)________ one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a better Major-General has (17)__________ sat a-gee
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the (18)__________________ of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser (19)__________ from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I (20)________ learnt
What (21)________________ has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics (22)________ a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a (23)____________________ of elemental strategy
You'll say a (24)____________ Major-General has never rode a horse!
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm (25)____________ and adventury
Has only (26)________ brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (27)________ (28)__________ of a modern Major-General!
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