Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And I (1)__________ the fights historical
From (2)________________ to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, (3)________ the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm (4)______________ with a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With many cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very good at (5)________________ and differential calculus
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (6)____________ Major-General
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I know our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I (7)____________ hard acrostics, I've a pretty (8)__________ for paradox
I quote in (9)________________ all the (10)____________ of Heliogabalus
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous
I can tell undoubted
Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I know the croaking chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of which I've heard the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And whistle all the airs
From that infernal nonsense Pinafore
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Then I can write a washing bill in (11)__________________ cuneiform
And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (12)________ model of a modern Major-General
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When (13)________ affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more (14)________ at
And when I (15)________ precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I (16)________ learnt
What progress has been (17)________ in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee
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For my (18)________________ knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (19)________ (20)__________ of a modern Major-General
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(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a (21)____________ rifle (22)________ a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more (23)________ at
And when I know precisely
What is (24)__________ by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been (25)________ in modern gunnery
When I know (26)________ of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
You'll say a (27)____________ Major-General has never rode a horse!
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very (28)__________ of a modern Major-General!
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