Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And I quote the fights historical
From (1)________________ to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm (2)________ well acquainted, too, with (3)______________ mathematical
I understand equations, both the (4)____________ and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm (5)______________ with a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With many cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very (6)________ at integral and differential calculus
I know the (7)____________________ names of beings animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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I know our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty (8)__________ for paradox
I quote in elegiacs all the (9)____________ of Heliogabalus
In conics I can (10)__________ peculiarities parabolous
I can tell undoubted
Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I know the croaking chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of which I've heard the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And whistle all the airs
From (11)________ infernal nonsense Pinafore
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Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And (12)________ you (13)__________ detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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In fact
When I (14)________ what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a (15)____________ rifle from a javelin
When such (16)______________ as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics (17)________ a novice in a nunnery
In short, (18)________ I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (19)________ model of a modern Major-General
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(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And (20)__________________ I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I (21)________ learnt
What progress has (22)________ made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a (23)____________ in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
You'll say a (24)____________ Major-General has never rode a horse!
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has (25)________ been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in (26)______________ vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General!
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