The Parent Rap by Bluefish TV

Don't make me count to 1-2-3
Yeah, it's the (1)____________ rap, y'all
We may spend most of our (2)________ chasing (3)________________ down but
We still know how to rock the hizzle
I don't even know what you just said

We used to be cool!
Back in the day, (4)________ on the block
Watching PG-13 movies, staying up way after dark
Then we had a couple shorties
And now we're (5)____________ flossy
Cause now we be rollin' with our own little possie
In the mini van
Or in our little wagon
Let me (6)__________ it to the moms
Cause the little one is saggin'

I (7)________ to bling it up, I used to dress (8)________ shrewd
Now I accessorize (9)________ food that's already been chewed
And that's all right
I (10)________ this diaper bag look good
When I'm walking through the mall tryin' to wrangle my brood
My (11)__________ will set your world on fire
I could make you mac-n-cheese blindfolded on a wire
I'm (12)____________ the do-do
Kissin' the booboos
Got them eyes in the (13)________ of my head, I see all you do.
Using your full name so you know I ain't playin'
And that's why all my kiddo's, they keep sayin'

Mom mom, she's the bomb, (14)______________ all night till the (15)__________ of dawn
Cooking them peas so I'll grow up strong
Got my second seat belt if we crash head on
Dad dad, he's the man, working real hard to support the clan
Traded in his porsche for an old sedan
Raisin' (16)__________ brows if we get outta hand

When it come to Candyland, I'm a stone cold player
Helping out with the homework, I'm an Algebra slayer
Wrestle carseats into place without spillin' my mug
If I (17)________ you in at night, you'll be as snug as a bug
Then I'm off in the morning, to make that cheese
You may not know this yet, but it doesn't grow on trees
Now (18)________ take it please, what, uh, take it

I'm droppin' "time out"s like they're hot
Potty training all my tots
Washin' all the pans and pots
Tyin' little shoes in knots
Giving knowlege to your brain
Like "if your (19)____________ jumped off a train you don't have to do the same"
Now get your toys out of the rain!
I'm cleanin' every spill
Cuttin' coupons like a vil
If you need (20)________________ skill now you know
We are for real!
You don't think our rhyms are ill boy?
Then (21)________ grounded for a mil!

Mom, mom, she's legit
Making us (22)__________ (23)________ we pitch a fit
Telling us to (24)__________ and never to hit
If you can't say somethin' nice put a (25)________ in it
Dad dad, he's the guy,
never gets tired of playing "I spy"
The constant barage of kids asking "why"
And he always (26)________________ he needs another tie

You know (27)__________ doesn't grow on trees
Why buy the cow if the (28)________ is free
This won't hurt you as much as it hurts me
If you want dessert eat another veggie
Close that door
You weren't (29)________ in a stable
Sit up straight
And kiss your aunt mable
Close your mouth when you chew
Get (30)________ elbows off the table
Mom and dad of the year, check it, that's the label

It's the parent rap y'all
And it's apparent
We're great parents
Mom and daddy in the house
Mom and daddy own the house
Mom and daddy need to clean the house...

Keep your hands to yourself, boy
Don't make me stop this beat, I'll do it! I'll pull this beat right over.

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