The Parent Rap by Bluefish TV

Don't make me count to 1-2-3
Yeah, it's the (1)____________ rap, y'all
We may spend most of our (2)________ chasing toddlers down but
We still (3)________ how to (4)________ the hizzle
I don't even know what you just said

We used to be cool!
Back in the day, back on the block
Watching PG-13 movies, staying up way after dark
Then we had a couple shorties
And now we're really flossy
Cause now we be rollin' with our own little possie
In the mini van
Or in our little wagon
Let me throw it to the moms
Cause the little one is saggin'

I used to bling it up, I (5)________ to dress real shrewd
Now I accessorize with (6)________ that's already (7)________ chewed
And that's all right
I (8)________ this diaper bag look good
When I'm walking through the mall tryin' to wrangle my brood
My PB&Js will set your world on fire
I could make you mac-n-cheese blindfolded on a wire
I'm wiping the do-do
Kissin' the booboos
Got them eyes in the (9)________ of my head, I see all you do.
Using (10)________ full name so you know I ain't playin'
And that's why all my kiddo's, they keep sayin'

Mom mom, she's the bomb, rocking all night till the break of dawn
Cooking them peas so I'll grow up strong
Got my second seat belt if we crash (11)________ on
Dad dad, he's the man, working (12)________ hard to (13)______________ the clan
Traded in his porsche for an old sedan
Raisin' those brows if we get outta hand

When it come to Candyland, I'm a stone cold player
Helping out with the homework, I'm an Algebra slayer
Wrestle carseats into place without spillin' my mug
If I tuck you in at night, you'll be as snug as a bug
Then I'm off in the morning, to make that cheese
You may not know (14)________ yet, but it doesn't grow on trees
Now mama take it please, what, uh, (15)________ it

I'm droppin' "time out"s like they're hot
Potty training all my tots
Washin' all the pans and pots
Tyin' little shoes in knots
Giving knowlege to (16)________ brain
Like "if your (17)____________ jumped off a train you don't (18)________ to do the same"
Now get your toys out of the rain!
I'm cleanin' every spill
Cuttin' coupons like a vil
If you need parental skill now you know
We are for real!
You don't think our rhyms are ill boy?
Then your grounded for a mil!

Mom, mom, she's legit
Making us chill when we pitch a fit
Telling us to share and never to hit
If you can't say somethin' nice put a (19)________ in it
Dad dad, he's the guy,
never (20)________ tired of playing "I spy"
The constant barage of (21)________ asking "why"
And he always (22)________________ he needs (23)______________ tie

You know money doesn't grow on trees
Why buy the cow if the milk is free
This won't hurt you as much as it (24)__________ me
If you want dessert eat another veggie
Close that door
You weren't born in a stable
Sit up straight
And kiss your aunt mable
Close your (25)__________ (26)________ you chew
Get your elbows off the table
Mom and dad of the year, check it, that's the label

It's the parent rap y'all
And it's apparent
We're great parents
Mom and daddy in the house
Mom and daddy own the house
Mom and daddy need to (27)__________ the house...

Keep your hands to yourself, boy
Don't make me (28)________ (29)________ beat, I'll do it! I'll pull this beat right over.

Answers: