The Parent Rap by Bluefish TV

Don't make me count to 1-2-3
Yeah, it's the parent rap, y'all
We may spend most of our time (1)______________ toddlers down but
We still know how to rock the hizzle
I don't even know what you just said

We used to be cool!
Back in the day, back on the block
Watching PG-13 movies, (2)______________ up way after dark
Then we had a couple shorties
And now we're really flossy
Cause now we be rollin' with our own (3)____________ possie
In the mini van
Or in our little wagon
Let me throw it to the moms
Cause the little one is saggin'

I used to bling it up, I used to dress real shrewd
Now I accessorize with (4)________ that's already been chewed
And that's all right
I make (5)________ diaper bag look good
When I'm walking (6)______________ the mall tryin' to (7)______________ my brood
My PB&Js will set your world on fire
I could make you mac-n-cheese blindfolded on a wire
I'm wiping the do-do
Kissin' the booboos
Got them eyes in the back of my head, I see all you do.
Using your (8)________ name so you know I ain't playin'
And that's why all my kiddo's, they keep sayin'

Mom mom, she's the bomb, rocking all night till the break of dawn
Cooking them peas so I'll grow up strong
Got my second seat belt if we crash head on
Dad dad, he's the man, working real hard to (9)______________ the clan
Traded in his porsche for an old sedan
Raisin' (10)__________ brows if we get outta hand

When it (11)________ to Candyland, I'm a stone cold player
Helping out (12)________ the homework, I'm an Algebra slayer
Wrestle (13)________________ (14)________ place (15)______________ spillin' my mug
If I tuck you in at night, you'll be as snug as a bug
Then I'm off in the morning, to make that cheese
You may not know this yet, but it doesn't grow on trees
Now mama take it please, what, uh, take it

I'm droppin' "time out"s (16)________ they're hot
Potty training all my tots
Washin' all the pans and pots
Tyin' (17)____________ shoes in knots
Giving knowlege to your brain
Like "if your friend jumped off a train you don't (18)________ to do the same"
Now get (19)________ toys out of the rain!
I'm cleanin' (20)__________ spill
Cuttin' coupons like a vil
If you (21)________ parental skill now you know
We are for real!
You don't think our rhyms are ill boy?
Then your grounded for a mil!

Mom, mom, she's legit
Making us chill when we pitch a fit
Telling us to share and never to hit
If you can't say somethin' nice put a sock in it
Dad dad, he's the guy,
never gets tired of (22)______________ "I spy"
The constant barage of kids asking "why"
And he always pretends he needs another tie

You know money doesn't grow on trees
Why buy the cow if the (23)________ is free
This won't hurt you as much as it hurts me
If you want (24)______________ eat another veggie
Close that door
You weren't born in a stable
Sit up straight
And kiss your aunt mable
Close your mouth when you chew
Get (25)________ (26)____________ off the table
Mom and dad of the year, check it, that's the label

It's the parent rap y'all
And it's apparent
We're great parents
Mom and daddy in the house
Mom and daddy own the house
Mom and (27)__________ need to clean the house...

Keep your hands to yourself, boy
Don't make me stop this beat, I'll do it! I'll pull (28)________ beat right over.

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