The Parent Rap by Bluefish TV

Don't make me count to 1-2-3
Yeah, it's the parent rap, y'all
We may spend most of our (1)________ (2)______________ toddlers down but
We (3)__________ know how to rock the hizzle
I don't even know what you just said

We (4)________ to be cool!
Back in the day, back on the block
Watching PG-13 movies, staying up way after dark
Then we had a couple shorties
And now we're (5)____________ flossy
Cause now we be rollin' with our own little possie
In the mini van
Or in our little wagon
Let me throw it to the moms
Cause the (6)____________ one is saggin'

I used to (7)__________ it up, I used to dress real shrewd
Now I (8)______________________ with food that's (9)______________ been chewed
And that's all right
I make this diaper bag look good
When I'm walking (10)______________ the mall tryin' to wrangle my brood
My PB&Js (11)________ set your world on fire
I could make you mac-n-cheese blindfolded on a wire
I'm wiping the do-do
Kissin' the booboos
Got them eyes in the back of my head, I see all you do.
Using your full (12)________ so you know I ain't playin'
And that's why all my kiddo's, they (13)________ sayin'

Mom mom, she's the bomb, rocking all night till the break of dawn
Cooking them peas so I'll grow up strong
Got my (14)____________ seat belt if we crash head on
Dad dad, he's the man, working real hard to support the clan
Traded in his porsche for an old sedan
Raisin' those brows if we get outta hand

When it come to Candyland, I'm a stone cold player
Helping out with the homework, I'm an Algebra slayer
Wrestle carseats into place without spillin' my mug
If I tuck you in at night, you'll be as snug as a bug
Then I'm off in the morning, to make that cheese
You may not know this yet, but it doesn't grow on trees
Now (15)________ take it please, what, uh, take it

I'm droppin' "time out"s (16)________ they're hot
Potty (17)________________ all my tots
Washin' all the pans and pots
Tyin' (18)____________ shoes in knots
Giving knowlege to your brain
Like "if (19)________ friend jumped off a train you don't have to do the same"
Now get your toys out of the rain!
I'm cleanin' every spill
Cuttin' coupons (20)________ a vil
If you need parental skill now you know
We are for real!
You don't think our rhyms are ill boy?
Then (21)________ grounded for a mil!

Mom, mom, she's legit
Making us chill when we (22)__________ a fit
Telling us to share and never to hit
If you can't say somethin' nice put a sock in it
Dad dad, he's the guy,
never (23)________ tired of playing "I spy"
The (24)________________ barage of kids asking "why"
And he always pretends he needs another tie

You know money doesn't grow on trees
Why buy the cow if the milk is free
This won't hurt you as much as it hurts me
If you want dessert eat another veggie
Close that door
You weren't born in a stable
Sit up straight
And kiss your aunt mable
Close your mouth when you chew
Get your elbows off the table
Mom and dad of the year, check it, that's the label

It's the parent rap y'all
And it's apparent
We're (25)__________ parents
Mom and (26)__________ in the house
Mom and (27)__________ own the house
Mom and (28)__________ need to clean the house...

Keep (29)________ hands to yourself, boy
Don't make me stop this beat, I'll do it! I'll pull this beat right over.

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