Amish Paradise by Weird Al Yankovic

As I walk (1)______________ the (2)____________ where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and (3)______________ she's very plain
But that's (4)________ (5)______________ for an Amish (6)________ me
You know I shun (7)__________ things like electricity

At 4:30 in the mornin' I'm milking cows
Jedediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've been milking and plowing so (8)________ that
Even Ezekial thinks (9)________ my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a (10)__________ in my (11)________ and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine
Then tonight we're going to party like it's 1699

We've been spending most our lives living in an (12)__________ paradise
I churn butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise
It's hard (13)________ and sacrifice, living in an (14)__________ paradise
We sell quilts at discount price, living in an (15)__________ paradise

A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him, and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my (16)________ off when he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't never punched a tourist (17)________ if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons, but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't (18)________ paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't (19)__________ and stare
We're just technologically impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as (20)__________________ as can be

We've (21)________ spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice, living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice, living in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' (22)________ of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise a nutter
Think you're (23)____________ righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a (24)______________ times as humble as (25)________ art

I'm the pioust guy the little Amletts want to be like
On my knees day and night scoring points for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or else my brother (26)__________ have to get medieval on your hiney

We've been spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites, living in an (27)__________ paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights, living in an Amish paradise
But you'd (28)________________ think it bites, living in an Amish paradise
Yeah

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