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Amish Paradise English Medium

by Weird Al Yankovic

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As I walk through the valley I my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know I shun fancy things like electricity

At 4:30 in the mornin' I'm cows
Jedediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've milking and plowing so long that
Even Ezekial thinks that my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine
tonight we're to like it's 1699

We've been spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
I churn butter once or twice, in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice, living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at price, living in an paradise

A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I smiled at him, and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my head off he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I buttons, but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as primitive as can be

We've spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're and simple guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice, living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice, living in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise a nutter
Think you're really righteous? Think you're in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a million times as as art

I'm the pioust guy the little Amletts want to be like
On my knees day and points for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or else my brother have to get on hiney

We've been spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites, in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights, living in an Amish paradise
But you'd think it bites, living in an Amish paradise
Yeah
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