Amish Paradise by Weird Al Yankovic

As I walk through the (1)____________ where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my (2)________ and (3)______________ she's (4)________ plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know I shun fancy (5)____________ like electricity

At 4:30 in the mornin' I'm milking cows
Jedediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've been milking and plowing so long that
Even Ezekial (6)____________ that my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a (7)__________ on my chin
But if I (8)____________ all of my chores, and you finish thine
Then tonight we're going to (9)__________ like it's 1699

We've (10)________ spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
I (11)__________ butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice, living in an Amish paradise
We sell (12)____________ at discount price, (13)____________ in an Amish paradise

A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I (14)________ smiled at him, and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my (15)________ off when he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't (16)__________ punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons, but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really (17)________ (18)________ in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just (19)______________________________ impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as (20)__________________ as can be

We've been spending most our (21)__________ living in an Amish paradise
We're just (22)__________ and (23)____________ guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no (24)________ for sin and vice, living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice, living in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise a nutter
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a million times as humble as thou art

I'm the pioust guy the little (25)______________ (26)________ to be like
On my knees day and (27)__________ scoring points for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or else my brother might have to get medieval on your hiney

We've been spending most our lives (28)____________ in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites, living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights, living in an (29)__________ paradise
But you'd probably think it bites, living in an Amish paradise
Yeah

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