Amish Paradise by Weird Al Yankovic

As I walk through the (1)____________ (2)__________ I (3)______________ my grain
I take a look at my (4)________ and realize she's (5)________ plain
But that's just perfect for an (6)__________ like me
You know I shun fancy things like electricity

At 4:30 in the mornin' I'm milking cows
Jedediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've been milking and plowing so long that
Even Ezekial (7)____________ that my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a (8)__________ in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you (9)____________ thine
Then tonight we're going to party like it's 1699

We've been spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
I churn butter once or twice, living in an (10)__________ paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice, living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price, (11)____________ in an (12)__________ paradise

A local boy kicked me in the (13)________ last week
I just smiled at him, and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in (14)________ I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my head off when he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't never punched a tourist (15)________ if he deserved it
An (16)__________ with a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons, but I got a (17)________ hat
And my homies agree I really look (18)________ in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be (19)__________ to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't (20)____________ quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as primitive as can be

We've been spending (21)________ our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no (22)________ for sin and vice, living in an (23)__________ paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice, living in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' (24)________ of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise a nutter
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a million times as humble as thou art

I'm the pioust guy the little (25)______________ want to be like
On my knees day and night (26)______________ points for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or else my brother might have to get medieval on your hiney

We've been spending most our (27)__________ living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites, living in an Amish paradise
There's no (28)________ or (29)______________ lights, living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites, living in an Amish paradise
Yeah

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