Amish Paradise by Weird Al Yankovic

As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just (1)______________ for an Amish like me
You (2)________ I shun (3)__________ things (4)________ electricity

At 4:30 in the mornin' I'm milking cows
Jedediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've been milking and (5)______________ so (6)________ that
Even Ezekial (7)____________ that my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a (8)__________ on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine
Then tonight we're going to (9)__________ like it's 1699

We've been spending most our (10)__________ living in an Amish paradise
I (11)__________ butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice, living in an Amish paradise
We (12)________ (13)____________ at discount price, living in an Amish paradise

A local boy kicked me in the (14)________ last week
I just smiled at him, and I turned the other cheek
I (15)____________ don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my head off (16)________ he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I (17)__________ (18)________ buttons, but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the (19)__________ bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as primitive as can be

We've been (20)________________ most our lives (21)____________ in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice, (22)____________ in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice, (23)____________ in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll (24)__________ a nutter
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a million (25)__________ as humble as thou art

I'm the pioust guy the little Amletts want to be like
On my knees day and night scoring (26)____________ for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or else my brother might have to get medieval on your hiney

We've been spending (27)________ our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're all (28)__________ Mennonites, living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights, living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites, (29)____________ in an Amish paradise
Yeah

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